Went back to PSPC today with Joel and Bing, just for old times’ sake. It was kind of nice to see old faces, but I also quickly realized I’m much happier where I am now, in ORPC. The atmosphere is so different! I don’t think I took much back from today’s sermon :( But we sang a lovely song during service – Casting Crowns’ ‘Who Am I’.

Who am I, that the Lord of all the earth
Would care to know my name
Would care to feel my hurt
Who am I, that the Bright and Morning Star
Would choose to light the way
For my ever wandering heart

Who am I, that the eyes that see my sin
Would look on me with love and watch me rise again
Who am I, that the voice that calmed the sea
Would call out through the rain
And calm the storm in me

Wandering heart is right :( So many times I’ve fallen from the path and turned my head and heart elsewhere…but He’s always been there, ever forgiving and always loving. It hit me today, that I really am nothing, a nobody – yet He persists in loving me anyway. And it’s not because of who I am or what I’ve done, but who He is and what He’s done. As Lot was willing to give his daughters rather than his guests over to an angry crowd, so God sent His own Son to hell in my stead. That sacrifice is so humbling.

I am a flower quickly fading
Here today and gone tomorrow
A wave tossed in the ocean
Vapor in the wind
Still You hear me when I’m calling
Lord, You catch me when I’m falling
And You’ve told me who I am
I am Yours

When you think about how much the world has been through, how old the world is and how many people there are on earth, really, one person is nothing. So transient and so temporary. And yet He listens to every single word of my prayers and cares for me as an individual. So many times I’ve had incontrovertible proof that His hand is working in my life, and my prayers answered.

I’m just really humbled today, because I realized that I’m no less important than the person next to me, or anyone else; I’m just another number and statistic in the world out of billions of people in this generation, let alone previous and future ones. Just vapor in the wind, a flower that’s here today and gone tomorrow. Yet God loves ME. He knows me inside and out, and loves me anyway. He holds my tomorrow, and my hand; and He gave His Son to die for me. I’m not just anyone anymore. I belong to Him!

How can you not fall on your knees and give thanks?

[4 bends in the road]