tell me about it

The strangest thing – I am growing old.

I just saw two girls walk past outside the room all togged up for an evening out to the clubs. I look at the day on the calendar. It’s Wednesday.

Ladies’ Night. Many a Wednesday night have I spent at Double O and Zouk.

But now the thought of clubbing and dancing and drinking just makes me feel tired, and happy to curl up in bed (or on my beanbag) with my book and a nice cuppa.

Ye gods, I am growing Olde.

Tonight’s ear candy: “I Wanna Love You” by Akon and Snoop Dogg. On repeat. Ad nauseam.

Is this not the prettiest shirt EVAR?

Why did they not reprint it during the Threadless Holiday Sale?

*mopes around the house and cries a little bit*

“Today’s special is the Sunday roast, sir,” I inform the customer in my chirpiest waitress voice. “Comes with Yorkshire pud and mixed veggies.”

“Yes yes, a very proper English meal, of course,” the man says ingenuously, but shakes his head. “I can’t have that. It’s got meat in it. I’m vegan.”

“Really?” I ask. “Wow. It’s really difficult to maintain a vegan diet in Singapore if you eat out all the time, isn’t it?”

“Not at all. I have no problem with my vegan diet. See, I do a vegan liquid diet,” the man says. I raise my eyebrows. He sounds like a real health fanatic.

“A liquid diet? No wonder you’re so slim.” I arch my eyebrows as I peer at him. “Well then, I’m glad to inform you that we have lots of fruit juices here. Fruit punch, lime juice, orange juice, tomato…” But he’s shaking his head vehemently at me – “No no no. None of that healthy shit.”

I’m a little taken aback. “But you’re vegan,” I begin to say, and the man can’t keep his grin in any longer.

“Yes, I love fruits and vegetables,” he says proudly. “I get my fruits from wine, and my vegetables from beer. Told you,” he beams at me while I give him an incredulous oh-I-can’t-believe-you-were-bullshitting-me look, “I’m on a vegan liquid diet. Gimme a pint of alcoholic barley juice. I specially like that brand.”

He points at the tank card on the table.

“Heineken please!”

Banana juice is an extremely efficient laxative.

Yaargh.

Before 10pm yesterday I would have said that things were going extremely well. I was sated, I was over the moon with happiness.

After 10pm unexpected events burst my bubble :(

I hate these unexpected bumps in the road that are nobody’s fault and hurtle in from nowhere. Blah. It sucks.

Aah, let’s not worry too much about it and just hang on through it all :)

Snarglebloop.

AHAHAHAHHAAHA!

Taken from Huat’s blog :D

:)

Us and Grandpa, who’s finally out of hospital. (Don’t you think it’s a little scary how Joel and Hanna have exactly the same smiles? People used to say Joel and I look exactly alike but now I think it’s Joel and Hanna who do. Hur.)

My cat has a disturbing penchant for falling asleep between my legs.

Here. I have photographic proof. Taken with my camera phone while my back was twisted at a painful unnatural angle in order to bring you this amazing picture.

She even sleeps funny.

And I don’t want to hear any wisecracks utilizing a certain alternative name for cat, and how it is between my legs. I really don’t.

Oh God. Why can’t I learn to let well enough alone?

It serves me right.

What have I done?

I have to confess I threw your pumpkin into the field.

“Let it rot,” I thought viciously as I hurled it as far as I could. “Let the birds eat it up.”

It was a tiny orange speck in a sea of green.

I’m sorry I did now. Not because I regret it but because I suppose I was just angry and hurt and bitter over everything. We both share the blame. We both took more than we should have.

Seeing you tonight, I think I can really completely let go now. You have no idea how hard I was praying before I joined up with the group. I prayed that He would take the bitterness, the anger. That He would cut it out of me. I was so afraid that seeing you would cause all the hurt to come back.

But it didn’t, and I’m thankful. Yeah…it was a little awkward. A little weird. But I feel better for it, because I can look at you without that little twinge of heartbreak in my chest now. It’s a start on the road back to being friends.

Thank you for the elephants :)